No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
