I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
