Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize