Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize