I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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