i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
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