It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Randomize