How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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