We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize