No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
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