he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
