it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
