It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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