yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
