we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
