I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
People in love make me want to vomit
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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