I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize