found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
