The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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