Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
