i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
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I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
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What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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