i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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