I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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