You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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