I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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