did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
