ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
