I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
