She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
