on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize