Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
