THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!