I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
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