You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
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She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
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I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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