i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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