Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name http://tfl.nu/j3pw
  Replies (13) Good night (6926) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop http://tfl.nu/zan9
  Replies (18) Good night (747) Bad night (2678)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed. http://tfl.nu/eoiy
  Replies (24) Good night (1493) Bad night (5528)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets http://tfl.nu/vdn6
  Replies (14) Good night (1152) Bad night (3908)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion. http://tfl.nu/bsvq
  Replies (15) Good night (5497) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick. http://tfl.nu/022f
  Replies (14) Good night (1032) Bad night (4553)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome. http://tfl.nu/m7qx
  Replies (4) Good night (3217) Bad night (1046)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both. http://tfl.nu/vzdh
  Replies (4) Good night (1057) Bad night (2158)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man. http://tfl.nu/dffi
  Replies (17) Good night (938) Bad night (2605)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck http://tfl.nu/0y2l
  Replies (6) Good night (2120) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level. http://tfl.nu/rkz6
  Replies (1) Good night (542) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off. http://tfl.nu/jh7m
  Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar. http://tfl.nu/gbhh
  Replies (3) Good night (540) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): 4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden. http://tfl.nu/r37f
  Replies (3) Good night (650) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s http://tfl.nu/7o05
  Replies (4) Good night (440) Bad night (605)

Randomize