Slut skills are useful in every country.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
