Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He felt like a one man threesome

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  (303): He felt like a one man threesome http://tfl.nu/1ehs
  Replies (17) Good night (9280) Bad night (1102)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.

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  (440): my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement. http://tfl.nu/zd8a
  Replies (16) Good night (5884) Bad night (1716)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay

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  (919): she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay http://tfl.nu/hwso
  Replies (13) Good night (3307) Bad night (833)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.

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  (786): You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager. http://tfl.nu/4g1t
  Replies (3) Good night (2968) Bad night (1205)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.

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  (403): Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl. http://tfl.nu/u7lt
  Replies (22) Good night (4567) Bad night (1599)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Me toooooo!! Margaritas

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good

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  (773): Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach (630): Me toooooo!! Margaritas (773): I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good http://tfl.nu/3y14
  Replies (53) Good night (1387) Bad night (3924)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..

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  (+61): i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history.. http://tfl.nu/iskw
  Replies (9) Good night (2271) Bad night (840)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.

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  (573): Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home. http://tfl.nu/anic
  Replies (8) Good night (630) Bad night (1652)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him

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  (813): You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him http://tfl.nu/hong
  Replies (5) Good night (1687) Bad night (659)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.

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  (613): Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again. http://tfl.nu/4a7s
  Replies (7) Good night (500) Bad night (1458)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.

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  (816): Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it. http://tfl.nu/1im6
  Replies (6) Good night (1356) Bad night (496)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out

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  (732): Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out http://tfl.nu/mgiw
  Replies (10) Good night (1569) Bad night (667)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.

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  (570): You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20. http://tfl.nu/twif
  Replies (2) Good night (647) Bad night (372)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.

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  (786): I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol. http://tfl.nu/3w3a
  Replies (2) Good night (635) Bad night (328)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep

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  (614): Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep http://tfl.nu/uw4b
  Replies (1) Good night (198) Bad night (465)

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