Texts From Last Night

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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing

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  (414): honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing http://tfl.nu/5ke6
  Replies (17) Good night (4081) Bad night (735)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...

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  (606): A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week... http://tfl.nu/yplk
  Replies (51) Good night (5218) Bad night (678)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway

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  (603): you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway http://tfl.nu/lrgo
  Replies (6) Good night (4666) Bad night (1100)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.

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  (902): Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left. http://tfl.nu/ytq9
  Replies (28) Good night (7284) Bad night (967)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.

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  (317): she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know. http://tfl.nu/4052
  Replies (16) Good night (1304) Bad night (5853)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.

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  (480): He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now. http://tfl.nu/isy9
  Replies (12) Good night (3895) Bad night (1483)
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  (818): View more from California

  Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO

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  (818): Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO http://tfl.nu/je4r
  Replies (7) Good night (1163) Bad night (3314)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.

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  (910): He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today. http://tfl.nu/xbxf
  Replies (5) Good night (1186) Bad night (1837)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.

  (682): View more from Texas

  They're mostly guys

  (817): View more from Texas

  Early bird gets the worm.

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  (817): I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single. (682): They're mostly guys (817): Early bird gets the worm. http://tfl.nu/9qay
  Replies (7) Good night (2537) Bad night (612)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night

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  (970): The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night http://tfl.nu/z7c2
  Replies (1) Good night (1973) Bad night (505)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter

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  (907): I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter http://tfl.nu/wvk4
  Replies (13) Good night (717) Bad night (594)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...

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  (770): Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now... http://tfl.nu/knzm
  Replies (6) Good night (969) Bad night (413)
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  (344): View more from

  So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  They're waiting for you to die

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  (344): So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof (774): They're waiting for you to die http://tfl.nu/5pk9
  Replies (6) Good night (2102) Bad night (536)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.

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  (443): Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier. http://tfl.nu/0m7p
  Replies (2) Good night (976) Bad night (482)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.

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  (615): Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of. http://tfl.nu/7ejc
  Replies (2) Good night (324) Bad night (599)

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