No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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