is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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