just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
