I heard we made out
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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