I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I've blown a few things in my day
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I think my moral compass just broke
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