Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
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They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
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Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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