I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
