Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  she woke up with a sticky ear

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): she woke up with a sticky ear http://tfl.nu/pkqo
  Replies (2) Good night (1071) Bad night (1936)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king? http://tfl.nu/6ro0
  Replies (17) Good night (675) Bad night (3142)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line http://tfl.nu/dt51
  Replies (19) Good night (4228) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened. http://tfl.nu/1lek
  Replies (32) Good night (18517) Bad night (972)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (786): Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic http://tfl.nu/fwzo
  Replies (58) Good night (1074) Bad night (5593)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  she is the kim kardashian of front butts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): she is the kim kardashian of front butts http://tfl.nu/khn5
  Replies (23) Good night (680) Bad night (5870)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  tonight lets celebrate not being married

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): tonight lets celebrate not being married http://tfl.nu/u5lc
  Replies (19) Good night (6968) Bad night (881)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!! http://tfl.nu/6xbj
  Replies (42) Good night (2558) Bad night (7074)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self http://tfl.nu/w7zw
  Replies (9) Good night (2603) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement? http://tfl.nu/mmb3
  Replies (21) Good night (4187) Bad night (1139)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous. http://tfl.nu/cb7r
  Replies (4) Good night (1364) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  ... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): ... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard? http://tfl.nu/u1hc
  Replies (7) Good night (433) Bad night (1319)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet http://tfl.nu/73eb
  Replies (1) Good night (455) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final. http://tfl.nu/105u
  Replies (0) Good night (705) Bad night (320)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for. http://tfl.nu/81ty
  Replies (0) Good night (744) Bad night (332)

Randomize