But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The air was thick with penises
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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