This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
