roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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