there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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