one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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